“Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”
(Proverbs 13:20, ESV)
(Proverbs 13:20, ESV)
Growing up near a lake, there was a saying that my mother often used to make a point. I would say something like, “George is allowed to do this, so I should be able to do it, too!” Her response would be, “If George threw himself into the lake, would you do it, too?” Whenever I brought up friends doing something shady or people who were doing something that was unwise, my mother would reply, “If they threw themselves into the lake, would you do it, too?” The meaning was obvious to me, even as a child. You don’t do things just because others are doing it. You don’t make choices that are questionable just because your friends have made them. You don’t follow the crowd. You follow God’s examples!
Proverbs 13:20 contains a rather pithy statement about making choices and following good examples. This verse makes a clear distinction between “the wise” and “the companion of fools”. Wise people choose to “walk with the wise”. They have friends who have wisdom and understanding, who follow God’s word and make godly choices. Unwise people are surrounded by friends who are fools. They make foolish choices. They make rash, ungodly mistakes. They are quick to follow the crowd, go against their conscience, and act impulsively. Unwise people often make “companions of fools”, causing undue stress and mistakes and sins to occur all too frequently!
In college, I met a man named Sid who seemed to have it all. He was a basketball phenom. He was constantly mobbed by girls. He was in great shape. One snowy day, we were both stuck in the dorm. Classes were cancelled. Even basketball practice was called off for the night. As I walked down the dorm hallway, I noticed his door open. Sid was staring off into space. Being the Resident Assistant, I asked him how he was doing. He responded with an unusual tone, “Just reflecting”. That started an interesting conversation.
With quiet hallways only broken by wind and snow battering the windows, I stopped in Sid’s room to chat. I wondered what make him say, “Just reflecting”. We struck up a conversation. I had no idea where that conversation would end up.
Sid told me about his senior year in High School. He was being sought out by a dozen colleges. He had at least seven different offers of scholarships or other perks to draw him to one school or another. He was well on his way to making it big in basketball. Being such a “celebrity” among the high school students, girls often sought dates from Sid and guys liked being seen around him. He had lots of friends and acquaintances. All too many were partyers.
One wintery night, Sid went out partying with friends. His friends loved sneaking in alcohol at parties. After drinking at one party, the group of friends decided to attend a second party. Sid was invited to go. He, of course, proudly drove his brand-new sports car, purchased by his parents with the “help” of a basketball supporter. On the way from one party to another, Sid missed a turn and crashed his car into a field. Sid almost died. One other person in the car ended up in the hospital, seriously injured. Two others walked away without a scratch. When news traveled around the city about the accident, Sid lost every single scholarship along with his driver’s license. Sid showed me a picture of his car after the accident. He reflected on how at the last moment, he dove down before the car hit a tree. That saved Sid’s life. We spoke for a while that snowy night on why he made his choices. It seems that alcohol and partying with friends led to everything wrong about that night.
There are many scriptures in the Bible that warn against not only falling to temptation, but they also warn about letting friends or family drag you down into a sinful lifestyle. Job had friends and family who wanted him to “curse God and die” rather than face his issues (Job 42:7, Job 2:9). Proverbs 14:7 warned the wise not to associate with fools, because they lack knowledge and direction. Fools cause quarrels (Proverbs 20:3). Fools suffer consequences because of their mistakes (Proverbs 14:6; 14:24). Those around them do the same. Paul had this to say about the matter: “Bad company ruins good morals.” (1 Corinthians 15:33, ESV). The Bible is clear; your choice of friends, whether godly or foolish, will have multiplied effects on your attitude and behavior. Ultimately, those around you help shape your spiritual life!
A man wrote the following years later: “In college, I had a friend who was always pushing me to take risks – 'Don't study, let's go out!' So, I skipped class one day. That night, he got us into all sorts of trouble, and I ended up on academic probation! I learned what Proverbs 1:10 warns us, 'My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent.' When friends lead us astray, we risk far more than just a bad grade!”
The Apostle Paul often talked about the importance of his godly traveling companions and friends at various churches. Several of his New Testament letters mention the help and strength he received from them (1 Corinthians 16:17-20 for example!). Can you also name those faithful people who have helped you along the way?
If you have friends or family that always seem to get you into trouble, keep them at a distance. If you have friends or family who keep you spiritually grounded and who pray for you, keep them close! But, more than anything, remember the wisdom of our scripture for today. Walking through life with godly wise people brings great spiritual benefits. Having foolish people around you will only bring regret in the long run. Choose wisely those who you keep close to heart and soul!
When was the last time a foolish friend caused you to pay for his or her mistakes? On the contrary, when was the last time you thanked a godly person in your life for their wisdom or strength or prayers?
Proverbs 13:20 contains a rather pithy statement about making choices and following good examples. This verse makes a clear distinction between “the wise” and “the companion of fools”. Wise people choose to “walk with the wise”. They have friends who have wisdom and understanding, who follow God’s word and make godly choices. Unwise people are surrounded by friends who are fools. They make foolish choices. They make rash, ungodly mistakes. They are quick to follow the crowd, go against their conscience, and act impulsively. Unwise people often make “companions of fools”, causing undue stress and mistakes and sins to occur all too frequently!
In college, I met a man named Sid who seemed to have it all. He was a basketball phenom. He was constantly mobbed by girls. He was in great shape. One snowy day, we were both stuck in the dorm. Classes were cancelled. Even basketball practice was called off for the night. As I walked down the dorm hallway, I noticed his door open. Sid was staring off into space. Being the Resident Assistant, I asked him how he was doing. He responded with an unusual tone, “Just reflecting”. That started an interesting conversation.
With quiet hallways only broken by wind and snow battering the windows, I stopped in Sid’s room to chat. I wondered what make him say, “Just reflecting”. We struck up a conversation. I had no idea where that conversation would end up.
Sid told me about his senior year in High School. He was being sought out by a dozen colleges. He had at least seven different offers of scholarships or other perks to draw him to one school or another. He was well on his way to making it big in basketball. Being such a “celebrity” among the high school students, girls often sought dates from Sid and guys liked being seen around him. He had lots of friends and acquaintances. All too many were partyers.
One wintery night, Sid went out partying with friends. His friends loved sneaking in alcohol at parties. After drinking at one party, the group of friends decided to attend a second party. Sid was invited to go. He, of course, proudly drove his brand-new sports car, purchased by his parents with the “help” of a basketball supporter. On the way from one party to another, Sid missed a turn and crashed his car into a field. Sid almost died. One other person in the car ended up in the hospital, seriously injured. Two others walked away without a scratch. When news traveled around the city about the accident, Sid lost every single scholarship along with his driver’s license. Sid showed me a picture of his car after the accident. He reflected on how at the last moment, he dove down before the car hit a tree. That saved Sid’s life. We spoke for a while that snowy night on why he made his choices. It seems that alcohol and partying with friends led to everything wrong about that night.
There are many scriptures in the Bible that warn against not only falling to temptation, but they also warn about letting friends or family drag you down into a sinful lifestyle. Job had friends and family who wanted him to “curse God and die” rather than face his issues (Job 42:7, Job 2:9). Proverbs 14:7 warned the wise not to associate with fools, because they lack knowledge and direction. Fools cause quarrels (Proverbs 20:3). Fools suffer consequences because of their mistakes (Proverbs 14:6; 14:24). Those around them do the same. Paul had this to say about the matter: “Bad company ruins good morals.” (1 Corinthians 15:33, ESV). The Bible is clear; your choice of friends, whether godly or foolish, will have multiplied effects on your attitude and behavior. Ultimately, those around you help shape your spiritual life!
A man wrote the following years later: “In college, I had a friend who was always pushing me to take risks – 'Don't study, let's go out!' So, I skipped class one day. That night, he got us into all sorts of trouble, and I ended up on academic probation! I learned what Proverbs 1:10 warns us, 'My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent.' When friends lead us astray, we risk far more than just a bad grade!”
The Apostle Paul often talked about the importance of his godly traveling companions and friends at various churches. Several of his New Testament letters mention the help and strength he received from them (1 Corinthians 16:17-20 for example!). Can you also name those faithful people who have helped you along the way?
If you have friends or family that always seem to get you into trouble, keep them at a distance. If you have friends or family who keep you spiritually grounded and who pray for you, keep them close! But, more than anything, remember the wisdom of our scripture for today. Walking through life with godly wise people brings great spiritual benefits. Having foolish people around you will only bring regret in the long run. Choose wisely those who you keep close to heart and soul!
When was the last time a foolish friend caused you to pay for his or her mistakes? On the contrary, when was the last time you thanked a godly person in your life for their wisdom or strength or prayers?