“…for you are still controlled by your sinful nature. You are jealous of one another and quarrel with each other. Doesn’t that prove you are controlled by your sinful nature? Aren’t you living like people of the world?” (1 Corinthians 3:3, NLT)
Henry proposed to his girlfriend, Sarah, when he was 19. Sarah was just 18. They got married six months later. Though young, the two were deeply in love. When their three children came along, the family grew closer together. They always ate meals together. Their evenings were spent with Henry and his wife getting the kids ready for bed and then, them climbing in bed exhausted.
Raising three kids is not easy. It takes a lot of time, effort, love, and patience. Over time, Sarah grew tired of her home life. She wanted to have more friends, go out on the town, and experience some fun once in a while. Because her husband was the only wage-earner, their funds were limited. As the children went into Elementary School, Sarah proposed to Henry that she get a job, earn money for the family, and their lives would benefit from the extra income. Henry knew this would involve a lot of extra work for him taking care of the kids when Sarah couldn’t be there. Despite his reluctance to agree, Henry promised to do what he could. Sarah took a job at the local school where the children attended.
Over the next year, Sarah began to change. She bought nicer clothes. She began to spend money going out with co-workers. She changed her hairstyle and demanded a new car to drive around. Each time Sarah asked for something, Henry knew it would only cause a big argument if he disagreed. So, Henry just went along with what Sarah wanted.
To help with their income woes, Henry worked overtime at his job. Six months after his overtime hours began, Henry started feeling overwhelmed by work and home responsibilities. Sarah’s increased spending and the couple’s lack of time for each other began to cause strife in the family. Arguments became more frequent. Disagreements caused days of silence between the two.
Two years after Sarah left home to start her new job at the school, she noticed that when Henry came home late, he sometimes smelled like alcohol. At other times, his clothes smelled like perfume, perfume that Sarah did not wear. With rage in her heart, Sarah began to inquire about Henry’s whereabouts, his job hours, and more. Henry obliged each time, but grew frustrated that his wife was getting more and more upset and angry….. and he didn’t know why.
At work one day, Sarah became ill with the flu. She came home early. On the way home, she swung past her husband’s place of employment and saw him hugging a woman outside. It was the woman who worked in the office next to Henry. Fuming at what she saw, Sarah vowed to make Henry pay. She stopped making love with Henry, though their love life had been seriously damaged already by Sarah’s lack of interest. Sarah also began to ignore Henry’s needs. She would complain if he asked for a meal to eat after work. She complained that she needed a maid to clean the house. She blamed him for things she knew he didn’t do. She just sought to make his life as miserable as she felt after seeing him hugging that woman from work.
One year later, the two were separated. It took them months of counseling with their pastor to finally work through their issues. During this marriage counseling, Sarah found out that Henry had never cheated on her, not even once. The woman from work he had hugged was leaving for the funeral of her sister. Sarah felt awful about all the ways she had treated Henry in her fits of jealousy and rage. As part of their healing, Sarah cut back to part time work to help more at home. She used part of that time to pray and join a church Women’s Bible Study group. She began to show more love to her husband. She also began to watch her spending and stopped complaining every time Henry needed something. Henry, too, made some changes. He became more warm and loving at home. He cut back on his overtime hours and his own spending. He continued helping Sarah with the needs of his family. He and Sarah went out on a date at least twice a month.
At one of the Women’s Bible Studies, Sarah confessed to the group of her past marriage problems. She regretted how terribly she had treated Henry before their counseling. She used to be so bitter. She used to be resentful. For too long, she had been jealous that Henry hugged that woman from work. Sarah made this confession after the group studied our scripture for today from 1 Corinthians 3. The scripture that made Sarah re-examine her responsibility for their marriage problems came from 1 Corinthians 3:3, “… you are still controlled by your sinful nature. You are jealous of one another and quarrel with each other. Doesn’t that prove you are controlled by your sinful nature? Aren’t you living like people of the world?” Smitten by the Holy Spirit at her past, Sarah admitted that for too long, she let her own insecurities cause strife and jealousy in her marriage. Her own desires to have more material possessions and be a “woman of the world” almost destroyed her family life.
For Sarah, this revelation cemented several things in her heart and soul. First, she loved Henry. Second, jealousy and strife in their marriage were signs that she was not being obedient to God. Third, when she became selfish and bitter, it was a sign that her “sinful nature” was taking control. Sarah vowed to never let her sinful nature take control of her life ever again. In a prayer late one night, Sarah renewed her commitment to God, to Henry, to her family, and to a right relationship with Jesus.
For Sarah, things could have gone very badly. If Henry did not love her and God, he could easily have cheated on her or left her. If Sarah and Henry would have failed to seek counseling with their pastor, things would have deteriorated in their marriage very quickly, leading to divorce. Thankfully, Sarah’s love for God was more important to her than the jealousy, anger, pride, and other manifestations of the sinful nature that begged for her time and attention.
Every human being has the danger of letting their “sinful nature” take control. You need to recognize the ability of your sinful nature to take control of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. If you let your sinful, worldly nature have its way, soon all kinds of strife will enter your every day.
Over the years, I have counseled many who suffered when their sinful nature got the best of them….
Keith had an affair with his secretary.
Danette stole from work.
Charley posted on social media lies about his parents that caused great suffering.
Darcy bullied her nemesis on the school cheerleading team.
Karl ate whenever he felt hurt or alone. He ballooned to a weight of 350 pounds in just a few years.
Terry ran to alcohol every time she relived her past.
Carson instigated fights between family members, taking joy from seeing their pain.
There are so many ways to let a “sinful nature” bring destruction upon yourself or those around you. Whenever you get the urge to let sin have its way, throw yourself upon the mercy of God. Confess your sins. Seek help. Be honest. Discover God’s truth. Once you let your sinful nature have control, the results can range from hurt to utter disaster for you AND those you love.
When your sinful nature threatens, remember what Peter said on Pentecost, “’everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.’” (Acts 2:21). When you feel your sinful nature bubbling up, find answers in the arms and direction of the Lord….
Raising three kids is not easy. It takes a lot of time, effort, love, and patience. Over time, Sarah grew tired of her home life. She wanted to have more friends, go out on the town, and experience some fun once in a while. Because her husband was the only wage-earner, their funds were limited. As the children went into Elementary School, Sarah proposed to Henry that she get a job, earn money for the family, and their lives would benefit from the extra income. Henry knew this would involve a lot of extra work for him taking care of the kids when Sarah couldn’t be there. Despite his reluctance to agree, Henry promised to do what he could. Sarah took a job at the local school where the children attended.
Over the next year, Sarah began to change. She bought nicer clothes. She began to spend money going out with co-workers. She changed her hairstyle and demanded a new car to drive around. Each time Sarah asked for something, Henry knew it would only cause a big argument if he disagreed. So, Henry just went along with what Sarah wanted.
To help with their income woes, Henry worked overtime at his job. Six months after his overtime hours began, Henry started feeling overwhelmed by work and home responsibilities. Sarah’s increased spending and the couple’s lack of time for each other began to cause strife in the family. Arguments became more frequent. Disagreements caused days of silence between the two.
Two years after Sarah left home to start her new job at the school, she noticed that when Henry came home late, he sometimes smelled like alcohol. At other times, his clothes smelled like perfume, perfume that Sarah did not wear. With rage in her heart, Sarah began to inquire about Henry’s whereabouts, his job hours, and more. Henry obliged each time, but grew frustrated that his wife was getting more and more upset and angry….. and he didn’t know why.
At work one day, Sarah became ill with the flu. She came home early. On the way home, she swung past her husband’s place of employment and saw him hugging a woman outside. It was the woman who worked in the office next to Henry. Fuming at what she saw, Sarah vowed to make Henry pay. She stopped making love with Henry, though their love life had been seriously damaged already by Sarah’s lack of interest. Sarah also began to ignore Henry’s needs. She would complain if he asked for a meal to eat after work. She complained that she needed a maid to clean the house. She blamed him for things she knew he didn’t do. She just sought to make his life as miserable as she felt after seeing him hugging that woman from work.
One year later, the two were separated. It took them months of counseling with their pastor to finally work through their issues. During this marriage counseling, Sarah found out that Henry had never cheated on her, not even once. The woman from work he had hugged was leaving for the funeral of her sister. Sarah felt awful about all the ways she had treated Henry in her fits of jealousy and rage. As part of their healing, Sarah cut back to part time work to help more at home. She used part of that time to pray and join a church Women’s Bible Study group. She began to show more love to her husband. She also began to watch her spending and stopped complaining every time Henry needed something. Henry, too, made some changes. He became more warm and loving at home. He cut back on his overtime hours and his own spending. He continued helping Sarah with the needs of his family. He and Sarah went out on a date at least twice a month.
At one of the Women’s Bible Studies, Sarah confessed to the group of her past marriage problems. She regretted how terribly she had treated Henry before their counseling. She used to be so bitter. She used to be resentful. For too long, she had been jealous that Henry hugged that woman from work. Sarah made this confession after the group studied our scripture for today from 1 Corinthians 3. The scripture that made Sarah re-examine her responsibility for their marriage problems came from 1 Corinthians 3:3, “… you are still controlled by your sinful nature. You are jealous of one another and quarrel with each other. Doesn’t that prove you are controlled by your sinful nature? Aren’t you living like people of the world?” Smitten by the Holy Spirit at her past, Sarah admitted that for too long, she let her own insecurities cause strife and jealousy in her marriage. Her own desires to have more material possessions and be a “woman of the world” almost destroyed her family life.
For Sarah, this revelation cemented several things in her heart and soul. First, she loved Henry. Second, jealousy and strife in their marriage were signs that she was not being obedient to God. Third, when she became selfish and bitter, it was a sign that her “sinful nature” was taking control. Sarah vowed to never let her sinful nature take control of her life ever again. In a prayer late one night, Sarah renewed her commitment to God, to Henry, to her family, and to a right relationship with Jesus.
For Sarah, things could have gone very badly. If Henry did not love her and God, he could easily have cheated on her or left her. If Sarah and Henry would have failed to seek counseling with their pastor, things would have deteriorated in their marriage very quickly, leading to divorce. Thankfully, Sarah’s love for God was more important to her than the jealousy, anger, pride, and other manifestations of the sinful nature that begged for her time and attention.
Every human being has the danger of letting their “sinful nature” take control. You need to recognize the ability of your sinful nature to take control of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. If you let your sinful, worldly nature have its way, soon all kinds of strife will enter your every day.
Over the years, I have counseled many who suffered when their sinful nature got the best of them….
Keith had an affair with his secretary.
Danette stole from work.
Charley posted on social media lies about his parents that caused great suffering.
Darcy bullied her nemesis on the school cheerleading team.
Karl ate whenever he felt hurt or alone. He ballooned to a weight of 350 pounds in just a few years.
Terry ran to alcohol every time she relived her past.
Carson instigated fights between family members, taking joy from seeing their pain.
There are so many ways to let a “sinful nature” bring destruction upon yourself or those around you. Whenever you get the urge to let sin have its way, throw yourself upon the mercy of God. Confess your sins. Seek help. Be honest. Discover God’s truth. Once you let your sinful nature have control, the results can range from hurt to utter disaster for you AND those you love.
When your sinful nature threatens, remember what Peter said on Pentecost, “’everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.’” (Acts 2:21). When you feel your sinful nature bubbling up, find answers in the arms and direction of the Lord….